Rule Number 5– Try to avoid discussing politics, religion or current events.

Now, you may think I have already covered this in rule number 4. This rule however is to help you cope with those group situations. Such as parties, a spouse's work event, or weddings. In these circumstances you will be meeting strangers. Now as an optimist / nice person you will be entering the event with optimism... obviously... so you will probably enter with a smile. Others will probably be sporting smiles as well. Now this is key. Just because others are smiling does NOT mean they are practicing nice people. You may introduce yourself and join the conversation. They are currently talking about the situation in xyz.  Now you may find you have very strong beliefs around this subject. Also, you are probably very intelligent and your point of view really could change their perspective and possibly the world. This is often when you will find you can talk the ‘shut up voice’ into being quieter. This is never a good idea. In fact, a good general rule is, when you are trying to tell the ‘shut up voice’ to shut up, you should excuse yourself to the bathroom. It helps if people already think you are funny because then it seems like you are doing a ‘bit’. If people do not think you are funny, run to the bathroom anyway. People thinking you are weird is a great start to avoiding conflict.

 I know some of you will think this is cowardly but I am not saying DON'T have strong beliefs. I am saying if you have them, try and remember most other people have them too and they probably differ from yours and they probably believe in them just as strongly as you do. Now, the only time stating your opinion does not lead to conflict is in the movies. Someone says I BELIEVE THIS!!! And the heroine comes up to them and says "You are wrong because of this, this and this, and you should look at it this way." Then the ‘wrong person's’ eyes get big. There is a moment of heartfelt introspection as they ponder their motives and their heart. Then they look down in humble acceptance and then the music swells, they look back up with tears in their eyes and they whisper "You're right."

However, in real life the same scenario goes like this: “I BELIEVE THIS!!!! You say “No, (because clearly you are the heroine in this story) you are wrong because of this, this and this. And you should look at it...” They then interrupt you with loud opposition. You continue to try and get words in sounding now a bit like a sick bird chirping “bu.. I...at... if... wh...” as he gets louder and louder. And then because you know you are right you think, ‘Hey maybe if I talk louder he will stop.’ Now you sound like a broken fog horn. Your husband is dragging you away as you continue to shout. He is smiling at everyone explaining that you take medication. (I am not sure why everyone gets this... I always wonder what medication, taking it for what, are we in danger here?) But anyway, it works in this situation as he drags you to the table of finger food you say “What!? This bright spark is saying the orphans should just get jobs! Where the hell are the 6year old orphans going to get jobs and who...” he then shoves a tiny hotdog in your mouth and you choke a little. He is smiling but he looks a little deranged as he says through his teeth “That is the bride’s grandfather. He has dementia.” You really start choking now but you are also trying to smile because people are looking. But now you have little bits of hotdog and pastry all over your face and even though it was a small hotdog, it is taking up most of your mouth, consequently, you look like you have had dental work done.  
So, only in the movies OK?